Unrealistic beauty standards, social pressures, unfair double standards, intense academic expectations, and changing friendships have a significant impact on teenage girls today.
Before hanging out with friends, middle school girls changed outfits several times because they were worried about how they would look in pictures posted online. What should have been a fun afternoon became a start of stress and self-doubt. Stories like this have become increasingly common among teenage girls.
According to a Dove Survey, 90% of girls follow at least one social media account that makes them feel less beautiful.
Girls are constantly faced with expectations about how they look, act, and live their lives. From social media to school friendships, it can feel like there is pressure coming from every direction. Many girls are held to unrealistic standards and are often judged no matter what choices they make.
Beauty Standards
For many girls, it can feel like they’re being watched and judged all the time. Social media tells them to be pretty, but not too pretty. Wear makeup, but not too much. Dress cute, but not in a way that gets called “attention-seeking.” No matter what choice a girl makes, it seems that someone always has an opinion.
“You see girls online who use filters and girls force themselves not to eat to look like the girls they see,” said Abby Green, 14.
According to Medical News Today, “over the last decade or so, the use of social media has grown. This is especially true among teenagers and young adults. This has led to an increased comparison to other people’s bodies, higher levels of body dissatisfaction, and a higher drive for thinness among these groups.”
Green also believes that social media has made beauty standards harder than ever to reach.
“Society has made it seem like you have to be the perfect girl who is skinny and flawless, but in reality, that is not how the world works,” she said. “What you see online doesn’t compare to what you see in real life.”
Many girls compare themselves to images that have been edited or filtered. With filters, photo editing apps, and beauty trends becoming more common, many girls feel pressure to look perfect both online and in real life.
“It sets unrealistic goals for myself and other girls and makes girls insecure about their perfectly normal bodies,” Green added.
Social Life & Peer Pressure
For teenage girls, social life can feel like something they’re constantly being judged on. It’s not just about having friends; it’s about fitting in, being included, and always knowing what to say, wear, and do.
Even small things like being left on read, not getting invited somewhere, friends talking behind your back, or seeing friends hang out without you can feel painful. Social media can make these situations even harder because girls often see what they’re missing in real time.
There’s also a lot of peer pressure to act a certain way. Girls can feel pushed to dress in a specific way, post the right things online, or go along with trends just to avoid being left out. Sometimes it feels easier to agree than to risk being judged or excluded.
A 2024 Pew Research study finds that among the 44% of teenagers who believe being a teenager is harder today than it was 20 years ago, 31% say it is because of greater overall pressure and expectations.
Double Standards
Many girls feel they are judged differently than boys for the same behaviors.
If a girl is confident, she might be called bossy. If she’s quiet, she’s told to speak up. If she’s emotional, she’s dramatic or too sensitive. If she doesn’t show emotion, she’s seen as distant or cold.
It can feel like there’s no right way to act.
Meanwhile, similar traits in boys are often viewed differently. Confidence may be seen as leadership, while competitiveness may be praised. This creates the impression that girls are constantly criticized, no matter what they do.
“If a girl does the same things as a boy,” said VOX ATL intern Reagan Hudson, 18, “she’s called loud, messy, etc. She is viewed as not ladylike and is criticized for her actions. Which can cause a lot of stress.”
Academic & Sports Pressure
Many teenage girls feel pressure to succeed at everything at once. School, sports, friendships, extracurricular activities, and family expectations can make it feel like there is never a break.
“One of the biggest pressures teenage girls face today is feeling like they have to be good at everything,” said teenager Emma Bell.
According to a Women In Sport study, 68% of teens feel judged by others, 61% lack confidence, and 47% feel pressure from schoolwork.
“Many girls feel expected to look good, have lots of friends, get good grades, do well in sports or other activities, and always seem happy and confident,” Bell said. “These expectations can be hard to keep up with because nobody is perfect all the time.”
For many girls, a typical day involves balancing homework, practices, studying, family responsibilities, and socializing activities. When one area begins to slip, it can feel like failure.
In sports, especially, girls are often expected to be strong, athletic, and competitive while also maintaining certain appearance standards. The pressure to succeed in every area can be overwhelming.
Friendship Changes and Breakups
Not all friendship breakups are big or dramatic. Sometimes friends slowly grow apart, and that can hurt just as much.
One day you’re close, and the next it feels like you don’t know each other anymore. Seeing former friends spend more time with new people can feel like being replaced, even when no one intended to hurt anyone.
According to Pew Research, both teenage boys and girls think girls have it easier than boys when it comes to having emotional support from friends. But they also found teens say that “anxiety and depression [are] more common among girls at their school than among boys.”
